Pulse May 2018 | Page 48

better word ) my obvious needs — like the overly large pores on my nose — by saying something like :

“ Michael , you have lovely skin ! I suspect , however , that you have to manage your pores very carefully . I am going to use something that will both calm them and tighten them . Let me know what you think as I apply it .”

A statement like that would break down my selfconsciousness of my pores , providing me both solace and a solution .

( As a side note , I was recently preyed upon in a mall by an overly aggressive lotions and potions salesman who first complimented my shoes and then said “ Oh ! You must simply hate those large pores of yours !” I am still in therapy over that one ).

Another example might be to remind me of my skin type while clearly providing me with education (“ you need to wear sunscreen ”) with a solution (“ I know you probably are afraid of sunscreen lotions that could be too heavy for your skin ”).

“ I ’ m going to end today with a lovely weightless UV defense sunscreen . It won ’ t feel heavy or thick on your combination skin , but it will give you amazing coverage .”

This is a really serious concern of mine , and the reason I didn ’ t wear an SPF for years on my face . They always made me break out , until someone gave me a solution instead of a lecture .

Now , let ’ s say I am the type of person who wants absolute quiet and peace and the feel of being rocked to sleep by Enya . How are service providers going to “ sell ” me anything then ? I bet it ’ s a lost cause , right ?

Not in the least ! My quiet still tells a story , if only from my skin . The key is active listening — with both the ears and the eyes . It is easy for a therapist to get into the rhythm of the facial , allowing their minds to wander to what they are going to make for dinner or whether the traffic will be bad on the way home , but I want them to see me . I have needs , even though I may not share them openly . Heck , I may not even be conscious

46 PULSE ■ May 2018