ourselves of a chance to claim the future we truly desire . Instead of worrying about what we may see as “ realistic ” goals or lowering our expectations out of a fear of disappointment , Seth advised that we should shed those inhibitions and write down , in as much detail as possible , what we want for ourselves .
Whether the goals we identify are personal , professional , financial or emotional , it is crucial not to let fear limit our ambition . Just as importantly , we must reinforce these goals by asking two key questions . First : Why do we want those things ? As Seth noted , “ Your ‘ why ’ will pull you through when the resistance shows up , and the resistance is sure to
show up .” And second : What are the consequences of not going after that thing ? By evaluating the costs — including feelings of regret and disappointment — of neglecting what we really want , we can better recognize the importance of going after it .
master the mind
“ Is it useful ?” This question , attributed to the Buddhist monk and author Joseph Goldstein , is key to helping us marshal our thoughts , whether positive or negative , and use them for good . When a thought occurs to us , Seth explained , there is a momentary space between the thought itself and our response to it . By asking ourselves , “ Is this useful ?” when a worry occurs , we can frame our response effectively . If what we ’ re worried about is beyond our control , then continuing to fret about it is not useful . If what we ’ re worried about is something we can take action against , then the worry is actually a useful part of helping us overcoming it .
The second framing device Seth introduced to the ISPA audience was the phrase “ Amor fati ,” which literally means , “ to love fate .” Essentially , what this phrase asks of us is that we not merely endure what we cannot control , but to love the circumstances we find ourselves in and seek out ways to make the best of our situation . “ Can we sit in the impact of what ’ s happening to our businesses and not simply accept it , but love it ?” Seth asked , while acknowledging just how much of a challenge it can be to treat these challenges as opportunities for unmatched growth and transformation .
lead from a place of spirit
Using former ISPA Conference & Expo keynote speaker Brené Brown ’ s definition of spirituality — recognizing that we are connected to one another and to something larger than ourselves — Seth invited spa leaders to recall the last time they felt moved by that connection . To instill that feeling into the cultures of our workplaces , he said , we must focus on creating a sense of belonging with ourselves and our teams . Creating a culture of belonging requires practicing vulnerability , establishing a sense of psychological safety and promoting shared values . By committing to and consistently practicing these three actions , leaders can create a culture of openness that brings out the best in every member of their teams . ■
These pillars of Seth ’ s message to the ISPA family serve as the perfect lead-in for his power session on Wednesday , May 12 at the first-ever ISPA Stronger Together Summit . To learn more or register for the event , visit experienceispa . com / stronger-together-summit .
APRIL 2021 ■ PULSE 59